Sunday, February 17, 2008
this year's cny has been a period of spiritual experience. it is very much different from all the past years. suddenly i saw a whole lot more to this world. and in the midst of it all i learnt to appreciate all the little things i have. also, interacting with small kids reminded me of how we've lost our generosity in love and how we've grown out of a simple mind. my niece sheryl and her cousin fernanda who are two little girls just kept drawing pictures for me and pictures of me as they sat and look at me and try to draw me. the feeling is somehow very good. i don't really know how to describe that feeling but it was the same as when i was pasting stickers inside a sticker album with my niece in muar. i think it's this feeling you get when someone is paying attention to something they do or just paying attention to you so fully you can almost see it in their eyes. i like that feeling. and they made my day by just drawing me and writing pamela i love you. haha. i also saw the quirks of the somewhat elderly and started fearing i would become like that in future. this cny though not over has already made me feel kind of queer. yet at the same time lucky to know that maybe my parents aren't that bad to me and my life isn't really that horrible as i always thought it was.
and to my one friend who's down, you'll be stronger when the dark period is over. love is everywhere don't worry about being alone. even small kids can give you love :)
and i finally got a response from the zoo to go down for an interview on wednesday. hopefully all goes well and i get the job!
love you like a sister;
11:39 pm
